I would go down on you faster than GM stock
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
