One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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