They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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