I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize
