Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
