Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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