She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
