your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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