FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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