I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
operation have a gay friend backfired
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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