i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
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