I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I'm just crazy horny about you
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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