who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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