I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
