So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize