Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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