My pussy is not your playground.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Dicks are not precious.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize