These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
