Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My breasts were aching with rage.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
