So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize