Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
