I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
