The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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