the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
