i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
