Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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