Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
