Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
NoShamevember. You game?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
