Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
