I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
