lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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