and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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