three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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