I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
