Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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