How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i think i have two assholes
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
