New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
