It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
