yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
