...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
