Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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