i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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