oh god the rape fog is back!
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize