I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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