physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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