I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
