He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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