so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
