i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize