i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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